True Stories from the Server Room

Pencil-Pushers

A Texas IT Legend in Five Acts

There was a point where I decided to step away from technology after being over-worked. Let's call it a "sabbatical." One day, a friend of mine—a senior enterprise administrator—called me up and asked, "Want to make some quick cash?"

"Sure, why not," I said, because, well, why not?

The gig? Moving boxes of PCs from one place to another. Surprisingly, I enjoyed it. My previous job had me working round the clock in Greensboro, North Carolina, and this was a nice break after moving back to Austin.

My friend showed up with a few junior IT folks in tow—guys who clearly had nothing better to do. Now, I'd worked with my friend at least 10 years ago. Then one of the younger guys opened his mouth...

□ Panel I — The Gig □
PC PC PC PC BOX 💪 "We're more like pencil pushers... and you're..." "Well, I am a fine specimen of a man." 😏
Him: "Why is it so easy for you to move these boxes?"
Me: (Grinning) "Well, I am a fine specimen of a man."
Him: "No, that's not what I mean. We're more like pencil pushers and you're…"

I looked at my friend and said, "I can't believe he said that." I actually can believe he said that because it's not the first time in my career hearing questionable statements.

I don't remember what my friend said at the time, but a few days later, he called again.

✦ ✦ ✦
□ Panel II — The Callback □
"Hey, we need a Unix Engineer. Interested?" "Sure, why not?" 😏 Senior Admin Friend
Friend: "Hey, we need a Unix Engineer. Interested?"
Me: "Sure, why not."

Fast forward — I'm now the lone Unix Engineer managing the combined infrastructure of three companies under a Texas State entity. We're talking Tandems, Unix, Windows, imaging servers, and Xerox high-speed printers — all the tech you'd expect for processing claims across Texas.

✦ ✦ ✦
□ Panel III — King of the Server Room □
TANDEM UNIX WINDOWS IMAGING XEROX XEROX 👑 LONE UNIX ENG "Three companies. One engineer. Zero chill."

One day, I get a call from a user. He's frustrated because he can't see a file he just FTP'd using his browser.

Me: "Did you refresh your browser?"
User: "Of course!" (indignantly)
Me: "Alright, where are you sitting?"

I walk over to his desk. The guy looks startled to see me — and it's the same guy that made the questionable comment. Without saying a word, I reach over, hit the refresh button on his keyboard, and voilà — his file appears.

✦ ✦ ✦
□ Panel IV — "Did You Refresh?" □
C:\FTP\file.dat 404 - FILE NOT FOUND ❌ F5 "Of course I refreshed!!!" 😡 FILE FOUND ✅ 😲
As I walk off, I glance back and say:
"You should know better than that,
pencil pusher."
□ Panel V — The Last Word □
"You should know better than that... pencil pusher." ✏️ 💫 💫 🤠 Austin, TX — A Texas IT Legend —

Sometimes the universe closes its own loops. And sometimes, you don't even need to raise your voice — you just need to press F5 and walk away.

✏️   💻   🤠
PENCIL-PUSHERS — A TRUE STORY FROM THE TEXAS SERVER ROOM
Fine specimens carry their own boxes.